Negative thoughts often spoil our lives, and do it unnoticed. We were just happy and calm, but in 5 minutes everything changed.
1. Unpleasantness is inevitable
It is useful to learn how to extract a positive component from them. For example, you quarreled with your soul mate. It would seem that there is good? But, if you think about it, you can see in the quarrel pluses. Write them down – this will allow you to look at the situation from a different angle.
Start a daily ritual: before going to sleep, remember who and for what you are thankful for today. It can be a gratitude to fate, relatives, friends and yourself. For example: “Today I thank the Universe (destiny, God) for having met a wonderful person (I pleased my relatives, etc.).”
This helps to focus not on problems, but on pleasant memories and to understand what an interesting life you actually live.
3. Determine the true cause of concern
If you are frightened by some situation, this technique will help you understand the true cause of anxiety and eliminate it. For example, you are afraid of losing your job. Ask yourself the question: “What’s the worst thing that happens if I lose it all the same?”
Consider all the frightening options for you: “I’ll stay with nothing,” “I’m threatened with ruin,” “I’ll die of hunger.” Analyze to what extent these fears are justified. Can the loss of this particular place of work really lead to such consequences? Depending on the answer, develop tactics for your future behavior (reserve options, capital accumulation, etc.) so that this situation no longer causes panic.
4. Fence off the negativity of the interlocutor
If you have entered into a dialogue with a negative person, use clarifying phrases that repeat what your interlocutor said, but in the key you need.
The chief: “You can not cope with this.”
You: “So you think that I do not have enough experience for this work? Can I still take it and at every stage consult with you? ”
Your positive attitude will help to direct the negativity of the interlocutor in a constructive direction, and most importantly, you do not have to charge it with a bad mood.
5. Learn how to stop negative thoughts
Our brain is designed in such a way as to concentrate more on the complexities and problems than on joyous events. Once it was necessary for survival, but now it only takes away energy. There is a way to get rid of unwanted thoughts. Say “stop” negative thoughts. Do not delve into her thinking, just note that she is, and do not go into it anymore.
6. Talk to yourself
Sometimes we are tormented by unresolved conflicts and grievances against people, and there is no opportunity to talk to them for some reason. “The technique of an empty chair” will allow you to learn to complete such situations and no longer think about them.
Place a chair in front of you and sit opposite.
Imagine that the person is sitting in front of you, and discuss with him your conflict.
Then change into the chair of the “interlocutor” and answer it from his face. You can do this several times until you reach the goal: to make peace with it, forgive and let go.
7. Determine what you really want
Inside us, invisibly there are those who dictate our behavior to us: parents, friends, acquaintances. In fact, these are different parts of our own personality. Your discontent with life can be caused not by personal beliefs, but by someone else’s attitudes. If they interfere with you, it’s time to part with them.
Complete the written statements:
“An adult should …”
“Whenever I want anything, I must …”
“In order to be happy, I must …”
Replace the phrase “I must” with the words “I want” and describe your own desires.
This technique helps to realize that you are an adult and are responsible for your life. And let it someone does not like. Your life, and live it to you.
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